Remote Monitored Systems: Indian mega spoof, announcing the same thing twice with more lies: when is the placing?

Having already admitted that it was going to run out of cash, the only questions are when will shamed Remote Monitored Solutions (RMS) do a placing and how massive a discount will the bucket shop spivs demand to get it away? To that end one can expect a stream of ramptastic RNS announcements using the Adam Reynolds keyboard and which often contain lies. Here is the first one today and it seems to have got the morons creaming themselves with joy even though this is, in fact, Remote announcing the same thing for a second time. If you needed evidence of just how dim shareholders in this company are….

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – “Anglo-Indian Pro-Larva mask partnership”…no financials (natch!)

Remote Monitored Systems AGM statement – the lies and the delays, gosh this is a disaster

It really is almost impossible to know where to start with today’s AGM statement from the disaster that is Remote Monitored Systems (RMS). It is long and wordy and I am afraid contains a blatant lie. But cutting through the waffle…

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – AGM statement tries to polish masks lack of sales

Friday Caption contest - Zak Mir's pumping of Remote Monitored edition

During the early months of this year Zak Mir was the hero of numerous bulletin boards but notably those for Supply@ME capital (SYME) and remote Monitored Systems (RMS) for his almost non stop buy calls and ludicrous price targets. By contrast in calling out Supply as a fraud and Remote as an overvalued POS, I was the villain of the tale. With shares in both companies heading south at a rate of knots I invite you to consider the cartoon below and offer up suitable captions in honour of my good pal the Sith Lord. Post away in the comments section below. Do your worst.

Remote Monitored Systems Trading Update (in name only)

That is because there really is no trading. But the update does contain an explicit warning that the cash is going up in smoke fast. This is a shocker. Some turds can be polished but PR man Graham Herring at IFC will not have bothered with this one. It is just a rough and ready turd au natural. And that makes the valuation a joke. BTW Graham: I wonder why the shares have fallen so sharply in the couple of days ahead of this awful update? It is a coincidence I am sure.

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – mask “encouraging conversations” but sales “not been significant”

It is almost as if it wants to distract from looming bad news: Remote Monitored has another spoof announcement

They keep on coming, these spoof announcements which will make bugger all difference to Remote Monitored Systems' (RMS) cashburn currently running at seven grand a day. I suspect this is to butter the morons up before admitting that the Francis McIntyre million face nappies a month deal has gone up in smoke. We were told on May 4 that it would be up and running again within two months. That would be by next weekend. Really? So today’s spoof?

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – MHRA approval for 5-ply mask… but any demand?

Remote Monitoring Systems' 2nd face nappy order but it is still trivial & what about deal one?

We still do not know the status of the first face nappy order announced by Remote (RMS) on March 4 for 100,000 masks and then 1 million every month thereafter. We were told on 4 May that within a couple of months the distributor Francis Mcintrye would be ordering as planned. I sense that with face nappy wearing set to become voluntary in the UK soon, that this will come to nowt. But fear not, there is news from India.

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – India mask distribution agreement, “initial modest number” (natch)

EXPOSE: Remote Monitored Systems – a new deal, it is ‘avin’ a Turkish isn’t it? Very inconvenient details revealed...

Following its very belated admission that the face nappy market had imploded, Remote Monitored Systems (RMS) needs a new way to promote its shares. Today’s effort will not impress even the most credulous of its deluded followers – an £80,000 sale to a £3 company. Whatever…

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – “new hydroponics agreement”… initial year expected revenue “around £80,000”

What is fair value for Remote Monitored Systems?

Now that Remote Monitored Systems (RMS) has finally confessed that its much hyped face nappy business is a worthless piece of crap unable to deliver any of the sales contracts alluded to as directors pumped the shares so they could dump their holdings, you may ask what is the company actually worth? The answer will shock those conned into buying the shares by the silky words of Zak Mir and others.

Letter to AIM Regulation – Lying by Remote Monitored Systems & SP Angel of the fraud MySquar infamy

The number of lies told by this company is so great that I have almost lost count. But then Remote Monitored Systems (RMS) is listed on the AIM Sewer where rule 67 states “Any company can lie to investors via RNS or in podcasts with Justin the Clown or that imbecile Zak Mir and the Oxymorons at AIM Regulation will do absolutely nothing about it.” Okay I made that bit up. And so, with no great hope of it doing anything about quite blatant RNS lying, I have written to AIM Regulation about Remote Monitored Systems and its Nomad and broker SP Angel asking for an investigation into a new £1.5 million lie that emerged yesterday. The letter is below:

Meet some trolls who own shares in Remote Monitored Solutions, and here is a picture of a swimming pool in Greece owned by a real value investor

For the past year myself and Gary Newman have repeatedly warned about the crazy valuation of Remote Monitored Systems (RMS), about the director lying – another one exposed today – and about the collapsing face mask bubble. We were met with derision and abuse for numerous online trolls.  On a day when our analysis has been wholly vindicated with Remote shares crashing, here are three of those trolls in action.

Vindication: Remote Monitored Systems car crash trading update as the face nappy bubble bursts

At peak ramp, folks like Zak Mir were telling you that Remote Monitored Systems (RMS) would be drowning in cash from selling gazillions of its high margin face nappies. I warned repeatedly that this was pure fantasy. Today the grim truth has emerged and the shares have slumped. Worse will follow.

SHOCKING: Remote Monitored shows that on the AIM Sewer it's one free money rule for the spivs and another for the rest of us

I shall turn to the abject full-year results and trading update from Remote Monitored Systems (RMS) in due course. Suffice to say, what is unfolding is exactly what myself and Gary Newman have predicted so many times and the shares, though down sharply today, remain on the bargepole list. The real shocker is buried in the waffle and the cashflow statement.

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – to return control of Gyrometric Systems to its founders with its investment written off

Remote Monitored Systems (#RMS) – 2020 revenue just £104k, administrative expenses £1.3m