The FCA has warned a potential purchaser of fund administrator, Link, that it must provide up to £306 million to pay fines for Link’s Woodford blunders. Some of this may go to the victims of Neil Woodford. But there are likely to be other measures handed out by the chocolate teapots.

This is a charade. A pretence. A farce. For the second time, Nicola Quayle, the former head of KPMG’s Manchester office has been fined for signing off on misleading accounts. KPMG has also been fined but the idea that this will change anything is just a farce.

Petrofac (PFC) shares have been good for trading over the past few years, assuming you managed to get your entries right, but the company has had too many potential issues to really have been considered an investment, unless you had a very high appetite for risk.

Earlier I wrote up the damning report by the FRC into KPMG and its former partner David Costley Wood. The latter lied about a scheme he had engineered which would have wrecked the finances of good ordinary decent working folks and screwed the taxpayer. He then lied about what he had done and fabricated notes of meetings 13 months after they took place in order to try and leg over the regulator. Had KPMG acted against Costley-Wood when it was alerted rather than only parting company with him a couple of months ago, the disgraced Mr Costley-Wood would have been more than £6 million worse off. And that is one reason why he doesn’t care about a £500,000 fine. As you can see below… Another reason is that he will not pay a cent of that fine….

Yesterday I noted how shitty little Aquis Listed Block Commodities had been fined £10,000 for lying to investors. In a way I celebrated as this was down to my work. But in a way not: I was cross.

As Tom Winnifrith said in his Bearcast on Wednesday, Yu Group (YU.) offered numbers in its latest trading statement which are completely meaningless – and thus its net cash position could be anything. I’ve been trying to piece some of it together.

Update. I have it on good authority that it was NOT Cloudtag fined. Hpefully uit will be. The share tip I mention at 7.45 can be accessed for £5 HERE. The notice of the £75,000 fine by AIM Regulation on an un-named company, levied last Thursday is HERE. That company not Cloudtag (CTAG) - it should be. Whoever it is should fess up. This is a dark day for AIM as it has fined the wrong party (the shareholders not the board) and in not naming the company it also screws the shareholders again. Regulators have form with private censures that let everyone down. I compare this to the 3DM scandal.

Hello Share Spinners. Well, that was a dismal end to the week. All caused by problems with the German banks. It seems however fast the Footsie goes up, there is always another whammy waiting round the corner. But let’s not be too despondent. This could be another of those things the City does so well - the nine day wonder. Soon the German bank crisis will be forgotten and we should see our shares rising stoically once more. 

The FCA is set to fine Cenkos over the Quindell fraud, the FRC has thanked me as it panned Quindell for fraud, and the SFO is making good progress on the Quindell fraud yet some morons still blame me for the penury they suffer as a result of ignoring our warnings that Quenron was a fraud. These fools really do believe that Rob Terry was a good guy and, unbelievably, are still trying to put me out of business. Step forward a troll on the ADVFN Asylum posting crap under the nom de plume NickyName.

Mugged pensioner Jim Bagot still has an outstanding gripe with AIM-listed WH Ireland (WHI). ShareProphets can reveal that tomorrow he will be back outside its London offices to resume his protest.

Disgraced pensioner mugging stockbroker WH Ireland (WHI) has already admitted that it faces a large FCA fine for all sorts of misdeeds (although not the pensioner mugging) but the scale of its, company-threatening - problems is likely to become apparent imminently according to a source close to the situation.

For once I am ahead of the game with my tax return. Thanks to the fine firm of Cawkwells - that is to say the long suffering Mrs Evil Knievil, my forms are agreed and being submitted today. But the deadline is looming...